Shadowing practice: Best of Michael Scott - The Office US

Listen to the line, then say it out loud
Line 1

Full transcript

  1. Dunder Mithlin, this is Pam.0:00
  2. Pam, it's Michael.0:01
  3. Help me.0:02
  4. I need help right now.0:02
  5. Michael, what's wrong?0:04
  6. I'm hurt.0:05
  7. I have hurt myself.0:05
  8. Oh Okay, wait wait wait Michael do you need me to call an ambulance?0:07
  9. No, I want you to pick me up.0:12
  10. Okay.0:14
  11. Wait a sec.0:15
  12. I thought you said that you were hurt Hey whoa Michael It's okay, it's Jim just say again really loudly what happened You burned your foot on a foreman grill0:15
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  1. I enjoy having breakfast in bed I like waking up to the smell of bacon sue me and since I don't have a butler I have to do it myself0:41
  2. So most nights before I go to bed I will lay six strips of bacon out on my George Foreman grill then I go to sleep When I wake up,0:49
  3. I plug in the grill.0:59
  4. I go back to sleep again Then I wake up to the smell of crackling bacon.1:00
  5. It is delicious.1:06
  6. It's good for me.1:07
  7. It's a perfect way to start the day Today I got up.1:08
  8. I stepped onto the grill and it clamped down on my foot.1:12
  9. That's it I don't see what's so hard to believe about that on test kit.1:15
  10. Okay, I'll be putting them everywhere and Please don't throw these out This is a rate -on test kit Please don't throw these out See them all over the office1:19
  11. Toby has been leaving rate -on kits everywhere like he owns the place The first time I threw mine away.1:31
  12. I thought it was an ant trap But I figured I'd rather live with ants than with his creepy little disc Second time I thought it was one of those1:38
  13. you know the things you turn over and moves like a cow thing But upon closer examination it was another ant trap, so I threw it away and the third1:48
  14. time I Did it out of spite Come on Michael you're interrupting you're kidding me God You say rate on a silent but deadly and then you expect me not1:59
  15. to make farting noises with my mouth What is this?2:12
  16. You know what?2:15
  17. We're not gonna die of read on we're gonna die of boredom Right and if I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler2:16
  18. bin Laden and Toby I would shoot Toby twice Okay, all right really funny and then you went too far I would kill bin Laden and then Toby no stone2:24
  19. Okay geniuses, how would you do it?2:35
  20. Yes?2:37
  21. It is true.2:38
  22. I Michael Scott am signing up with an online dating service Thousands of people have done it and I am going to do it.2:39
  23. I need a username and I have a great one Little kid lover that way people will know exactly where my priorities are at Hey cuz I heard you're having2:46
  24. money problems.3:06
  25. No you didn't listen.3:07
  26. I got the answer you declare bankruptcy All your problems go away.3:09
  27. How would that help creed in monopoly you go bankrupt you lose you don't go by monopoly man That game is nuts.3:13
  28. Nobody just picks up get out of jail free cards those things cost thousands That is a good point bankruptcy Michael is natures do over it's a fresh start It's3:20
  29. a clean slate like the witness protection program exactly I've always wanted to be in the witness protection program Fresh start no debts no baggage Fart I got my name3:32
  30. picked out Lord Rupert Everton.3:45
  31. I'm a Shipping merchant who raises fancy dogs That's the life I Declare bankruptcy Okay, Wendy hot and juicy redhead give this a try I Wendy's Hello, Wendy.3:48
  32. This is Kevin's friend Michael This isn't Wendy.4:23
  33. Oh, I'm sorry.4:28
  34. Could you put her on please?4:28
  35. This is a Wendy's restaurant Okay Could I just have a frosty and a baked potato, please You have to come to the restaurant to order food well send somebody4:29
  36. to pick it up just have it ready.4:43
  37. It's ready now Well put it aside No God No God, please no no no What's up Michael like a gum in my ear you do this just Stinks don't4:44
  38. touch it.5:09
  39. Please don't touch it.5:09
  40. You got a ton of dandruff.5:10
  41. Okay.5:11
  42. Let me be how'd you get coming here?5:12
  43. I was walking in and I noticed something shiny under Stanley's car And I got under to see what it was and I messed up my hair all for a5:14
  44. stupid piece of tin foil But best case scenario you thought I was a quarter kill me right now.5:21
  45. We have peanut butter in the kitchen.5:26
  46. I Don't feel like peanut butter.5:29
  47. Give me an ice cream sandwich.5:30
  48. Nope not for you.5:32
  49. It's for your hair and it is 9 a .m No Dwight not the good peanut butter people are gonna get mad.5:32
  50. Hey, hey, hey, this is my hair.5:39
  51. We're talking about Smells good It's good too.5:40
  52. Oh, don't that's disgusting a lot of calories Well, just don't leave it on too long Keep massaging, please Jim could you come in here, please?5:48
  53. Hi Jim hello, I am Harvey a computer Jim sucks Wow, that's so rude.6:06
  54. I'm sorry.6:19
  55. I can't control it.6:20
  56. Yeah, you know I get Pam for this Pam Pam you look very hot today I Mean Harvey this is my close new friend great me so horny me love6:21
  57. you long Tim.6:38
  58. Oh, oh That is gross whose long Tim Long time me love you a long time.6:39
  59. Oh, well, you should bring long Tim in one day.6:50
  60. No, I'd love to meet mom Yeah, right?6:52
  61. Yeah, you ruined a funny joke you get out of my off -ive Okay, bye Harvey Boobs Phil recruited me to sell these cards and now I am recruiting you6:54
  62. who is this guy again?7:11
  63. Don't worry about Phil.7:12
  64. He drives a Corvette.7:13
  65. He is doing just fine.7:14
  66. Okay Calling cards are The wave of the future these things sell themselves.7:15
  67. Who uses calling cards anyway?7:21
  68. You know what?7:22
  69. That's a nice attitude Ryan.7:23
  70. I'm just helping you invest in your future my friend.7:24
  71. It sounds like a get rich quick scheme Yes, thank you.7:27
  72. You will get rich quick.7:30
  73. We all will Can you lose a lot of money on that other investment one from the email?7:31
  74. You know what Toby when the son of the deposed king of Nigeria emails you directly asking for help you help his father ran the Freakin country, okay All right,7:36
  75. so raise your hand if you want to get rich All right.7:46
  76. No, how is this not a pyramid scheme?7:50
  77. All right, let me explain again Phil has recruited me and another guy now We are getting three people each the more people to get involved the more people who7:54
  78. are Investing the more money we're all gonna make it's not a pyramid scheme.8:07
  79. It is a it's not even a scheme per se.8:11
  80. It's I Have to go make a call Oh My life Michael what's wrong?8:14
  81. Everything's wrong The stress of my modern office has caused me to go into a depression Depression isn't that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out Dwight you ignorant8:32
  82. slut Depression is a very serious illness over 32 ,000 people commit suicide Every year according to a 2004 study is not the last year the data was available.8:45
  83. Yes My head is in such pain and turmoil Don't do anything rash.8:58
  84. Dwight.9:05
  85. Where are the warehouse guys?9:05
  86. I?9:08
  87. didn't I Didn't think you needed them for this part.9:11
  88. Okay, that's you said to just that's the whole point dummy.9:14
  89. Okay.9:18
  90. I'm on it, okay?9:19
  91. Attention blue collar workers Michael is up on the roof and he's acting strange.9:22
  92. Oh My life Michael what's wrong?9:29
  93. Everything is wrong Dwight the stress of my modern office has made me depressed Depressed isn't that just a fancy word for feeling bummed out Dwight you ignorant slut I9:33

American Accent Training with a B1 Sitcom Phone Call

This clip opens with a panicked phone call between Pam, Michael and Jim, then slides into Michael's rambling explanation of his George Foreman grill and a rant about rat on kits scattered around the office. It sits at B1 level and runs at 144 words per minute, faster than 15 percent of the catalogue, so the words come quickly and the register keeps flipping between fake distress, deadpan explanation and mock outrage. That combination makes it a solid pick for american accent training: a rising panicked call, a flat sarcastic aside from Jim, and a long winded rant, all inside a few minutes.

Because three people talk over each other early on, it also works as english speaking practice for daily use: real interruptions, one person finishing another's line, a joke landing mid sentence. If your practice so far has only covered calm scripted dialogue, this scene forces you to keep pace with someone who talks fast and switches tone without warning.

How to Pronounce English Words Like Michael Scott

Three lines carry the interesting work here, and all three are worth repeating out loud before you try the whole scene.

  • "I thought you said that you were hurt" is Jim's opening line as he steps into Michael's prank call. The stress lands on "said" and "hurt", and the pace stays level even though the content is meant to sound urgent, which is the joke: he already knows nothing is wrong.
  • "You burned your foot on a foreman grill" follows straight after, delivered flat and fast, with the stress bunched on "foreman grill" rather than spread evenly. Saying it at that same clipped pace is harder than it looks at B1.
  • "We're not gonna die of read on we're gonna die of boredom" doubles the reduced "gonna" in one breath. Both reductions get swallowed at speed, and the punch of the line depends on hitting "boredom" harder than "read on" right before it.

A Line by Line English Speaking Practice Plan for This Clip

Work through this clip in the order it actually happens, not out of sequence, since the tone shift between sections is part of what makes it worth practising.

  • Start with lines 1 to 9, the phone call. Say Pam's flat "Dunder Mithlin, this is Pam" first, then Michael's rising "I need help right now", so you feel the contrast before Jim's deadpan enters.
  • Shadow line 12 on its own a few times: "I thought you said that you were hurt" into "You burned your foot on a foreman grill". Keep Jim's delivery flat all the way through, that flatness is the whole joke.
  • Move to lines 13 to 20, Michael's grill monologue. It runs as one long breath at 144 words per minute, so read it once slowly for the words, then again at full speed without stopping for the run on sentences.
  • Finish with an english shadowing practice pass on line 29: repeat "we're not gonna die of read on we're gonna die of boredom" until both "gonna" contractions come out smooth and the stress falls where Michael puts it, on "boredom".
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